The Next ~20 Weeks

25 Weeks

My second trimester was a breeze, but as soon as my third trimester hit, things started getting worse and worse. I'm almost never comfortable. I'm lucky to get an hour or two of uninterrupted sleep, thanks to the giant body pillow that takes up more than my fair share of the bed. Between wrestling that pillow, the constant need to pee, heartburn, restless legs, cramps, the wiggly little night owl in my tummy, and my hips cracking (and feeling) like they're splitting in half every time I try to roll over... neither Todd nor I have been consistently well-rested in months.

The hormones that made me so pleasant and joyful and excited in the second trimester have turned. I spent most of the weekend of my baby shower crying. Not sweet, slightly overwhelmed tears--distraught tears. I'm not prone to depression. I don't like it. We moved from our one bedroom apartment to a three bedroom townhouse 8 months along... I will try very hard never to do that again, it was the major factor in my mental decline. And I was sad to be spending our last month as non-parents in such a fluster of chores.

Todd has done all of the work I just can't do. He's handled my crazy without making me feel bad for it. He's willingly slept on the tiniest sliver of bed, getting barely more sleep than I do. Thank goodness for that husband of mine.

27 Weeks

Luckily, most of the time I still feel okay. After a tough month of moving, we've been able to take time together to do things besides assemble flat-packed furniture. Being miserable is intolerable, so I'm trying hard to enjoy these last few days without complaint or regard to the inconveniences. Trying to rediscover some of that second-trimester joy.

31 Weeks

Things I like: feeling the baby move. I thought I'd only feel flutters or a little kick now and again, and I thought it would gross me out. But I watch him make waves roll across my stomach and sometimes he moves so much it shakes me. I'm always grabbing Todd's hand to feel a little knee or bum sticking up before he moves it. It's like he's constantly reminding me he's there.

I thought I would be self-conscious about being hugely pregnant, but I'm not. I'm reeeealllllly looking forward to going back to normal (or close). But I'm lucky I can still wear all of my shoes and my wedding ring and I have just two tiny stretch marks. When all is said and done, I'll have gained about 40 pounds. And I can (and do) safely indulge my main craving to my heart's content-- ice!

Todd and I often talk about how happy we are to be having a boy. I was so surprised this baby isn't a girl, it took a few weeks for the happiness to sink in, but I absolutely would not have it any other way. It is right and we are thrilled. We are meant to be parents to a son and we can't wait to meet him.

36 Weeks

We went to Wal-Mart for groceries a few hours after this picture was taken. A big black woman stopped dead in her tracks when she saw me, exclaimed "GIRL, you HUGE!" and told me there was no way I'd make it to my due date. Ha!

The First 20 Weeks

5-8 Weeks

I have generally felt okay... the fact that I'm not living over the toilet bowl is the shock of my life. To call what little nausea I've had "Morning Sickness" would really be a disgrace to Morning Sickness. But it does make even thinking about eating unpleasant. If babies' eating habits are set in the womb, this child's primary food groups will be crackers and Nutella, the only things I can stomach reliably.

The things I've been craving are mostly things I can't get in Denmark: baloney + American cheese sandwich on white bread, Subway Cold Cut Combo with tons of mayo, pizza Lunchables, Chipotle salad, Cafe Rio salad, chicken nuggets. And burritos, like you wouldn't believe. My main aversion has been to chicken-- I can eat it just fine in nugget form, but the thought of cooking a chicken breast is sickening.

Baby W got his/her first nicknames. I called him/her "Baby Blueberry," due to the fact that he/she was the size of a blueberry sometime recently. Todd changed that to "Old Blue." (We watched A Christmas Story this month.) So sorry, child.

9 Weeks
My nausea and aversions have gone way down, HOORAY! I don't hate all food! I eat stuff! I can swallow my huge vitamins that smell like regurgitated dirt! I still don't look at all pregnant, though I now can't suck my stomach all the way flat.

According to every old wives' tale I've ever heard, we're expecting a boy. My complexion is fine, I mostly crave savory things, I'm not terribly sick, and the Chinese Gender Chart says boy. Todd leans a little toward wanting a boy and I lean a little toward wanting a girl, but obviously neither of us truly cares. I just want to know.


10 Weeks
I told my high school friends and the Darden wives about the pregnancy today. So much for my years-old plan to keep the pregnancy to ourselves until 20 weeks! I would surely have let something slip anyway.

Aside from tiredness (especially in the evening), I feel better every day. And baby was thankfully 100% cooperative on my flights from Denmark back to the US. I can eat vegetables again and more foods sound edible all the time, though I'm still iffy on chicken. Weirdest aversion.

11 Weeks
We got to see Baby W for the first time this week! Seeing him/her on the ultrasound was just crazy--something's really in there, and it moves! I expected to see an alien blob, but you could nearly count fingers and toes! The doctor took a couple pictures of the scan for me to take home, then Baby W started "performing" by kicking his/her feet and fist pumping, so she took a few more. Todd was sad to miss the first ultrasound (he's still in Denmark), but happy for a good report and pictures!

12-13 Weeks
I absolutely must have pizza Lunchables.

14 Weeks
My family saw me for the first time since I've been pregnant. My sisters giggled and pointed at my tummy (which still looks like nothing to anyone except those who know) because yes, it's a little funny to see me looking a bit... round.

15 Weeks
I may have felt the baby move? Todd and I were playing Risk (the board game) with Caitlin, and I felt something possibly squirm slightly?

16 Weeks
More of this brief, squirmy stuff... I do think that's the baby.

17 Weeks
Now I'm sure s/he's moving around. It feels like popcorn popping inside my lower tummy... but sometimes it's a distinct kick!

We find out Baby's gender next week. I still think it's a girl and will be very surprised if it isn't. Not unhappily surprised, though. I truly don't care. Todd thinks it's a boy and he thinks he'll be right because he suspected I was pregnant when I assured him I wasn't.

18 Weeks
So much for motherly intuition-- Todd was right, it's a BOY! I think daddy is rather proud. I was just so happy to see  10 fingers, 10 toes, and nothing we should be worried about. He's a squirmy little guy-- the ultrasound pictures are all blurry because he would.not.hold.still.

19 Weeks
Todd felt the baby kick for the first time-- he was thrilled. It was sweet, I won't lie. And I definitely think I'm looking pregnant these days. I'm down to one pairs of pants that still button. Stretch, hips, stretch!

20 Weeks
I got my first random stranger tummy run from the checkout lady at Costco. It didn't bug me nearly as much as I thought it would. We're halfway to baby! And if it doesn't look like much... refer back to week 5 and you'll clearly see these extra 15 lbs.

AMERICA!

Raleigh 1.20.14

I had to fly home from Europe by myself while Todd stayed in Copenhagen to work for two more weeks. I was really nervous about it when we booked my tickets back in July (flying + alone + ocean = confluence of my worst fears) but I was hardly nervous at all the day I flew! Maybe my phobia is disappearing, maybe I was too excited about home to care, or maybe I was successfully limiting my stress for the sake of my child. But I'll give credit where I really think its due: Todd gave me a Priesthood blessing the night before.

Things were going smoothly until we were checking my bags at the airport and I pulled Todd's passport out of my pocket and handed it to the desk agent.

I have this completely remarkable ability to remember a thousand tiny details and forget the one absolutely crucial piece, which has somehow become even worse with pregnancy. So I was really careful to have all my ducks in a row for the return home. The luggage was sorted, labelled, packed, ready. I had specifically put my passport in the interior zipped pouch of my carry-on days before so I wouldn't forget the one thing I couldn't leave the country without. Just that morning, I had taken Todd's passport out and left on the desk at our apartment... CRAP.

My flight left in 90 minutes and it would take at least 2 hours for us to go all the way back to Østerbro- we'd have to reschedule my entire trip. Rather than choosing a productive response, I started bawling my eyes out.

Todd handled my crazy like a champ. He went to the ticketing desk and started the process of rescheduling me for a later flight while trying to reassure me that everything would be fine. I just stood there, sobbing. (I'm normally not drama like that... pregnancy.)

Then I realized, the passport I gave the desk agent came from my pocket. I hadn't checked the zipped pouch.

So I checked the pouch, and guess what was inside? It turns out I had both of our passports with me. What was a major disaster in my morning turned out to be a blessing-- what if I had checked my bag first instead of my pocket, and unknowingly traveled all the way to America with Todd's passport?

Still shaken at THAT whole experience, plus having to leave Todd (which I've never been good at), I was quite red-eyed when I went through security. The security man asked me if I was okay, and I said 'yes' unconvincingly. He saw my birthplace on my passport and said "Utah? No NFL team, right? You like football? Who's your team then?" Ha! What a nice guy, seeing a need and trying to cheer me up.

After that, my trip home couldn't possibly have gone better. (Except the part where I left my passport on a scanning station at emigration in New York. What do I need to do, tether that thing to me?!)

My jet lag was pretty bad, so I woke up the next morning at like 4:30. I occupied myself around the apartment until 7, then I went to get some breakfast and drove around while watching the sun rise. The temperature was in the 60s and the sun was shining. I felt absolutely joyful. I hadn't realized how depressed I'd been for at least a month. I was so happy to be home.

So many Tender Mercies-- from no flight phobia, to discovering Todd's passport, to the nice security guy, to the empty seats next to me on my trans-Atlantic flight, to the lack of pregnancy fatigue, to the kid who found my passport in NYC, to a sunny 60-degree day in January. So grateful.

Hej hej, København!

I was a real stink about Denmark our last month there. It wasn't all Denmark's fault, but a combination of homesickness, my usual Seasonal Affective Disorder (greatly exacerbated by the wind and lack of daylight), and pregnancy/food aversions.

We spent just about every night watching How I Met Your Mother/Parenthood/Arrested Development and counting days until we could go home. There really was not a lot else to do. We were both ready to leave.

Landemaerket

Still, we'll definitely miss things about living in Copenhagen--the sounds of the city (cruise ship horns, bicycle bells, train announcements and pass scanners, police sirens), the beautiful old buildings, riding the trains, easy travel to amazing places, and giving directions like "it's up the street to the left, across from the castle." 

I don't think I'll miss the food or grocery stores, how much everything costs, seeing/hearing Danish, never seeing a blue sky, having church meetings translated, or waiting for the bus to church in the freezing cold (it's always late).

On my last day in Copenhagen, we had dinner on Bredgade and walked to Amalienborg Palace. It was frigid and insanely windy, so we quickly walked over to Nyhavn and up to Kongens Nytorv where we took the train home. I thought it was a fitting end to the experience-- it's the reverse of what we did on our first day there in July and our favorite place downtown. Unfortunately, it was too cold to spend much time reminiscing or soaking up the experience. (Two weeks later, Todd did the same walk on his last Saturday in Copenhagen. Same result. Winter in Copenhagen is just not good.)

We may miss Europe more than Denmark, but in some ways, Denmark became home-- familiar and comfortable. I'm sure the memories of the last few freezing, boring, dark weeks will fade and memories of the first few wonderful months will be what we really remember. This was easily the coolest experience of our lives so far. Seriously, who gets paid to live and travel around Europe for half a year? We don't know what we did to deserve such an awesome blessing and we are so grateful for it.

Hej hej, København!

His & Hers: Copenhagen Favorites

I made an ambitious goal to visit every square in Copenhagen. I gave up on it quickly... too many boring ones. Here's a nice one :)

Place to Eat
M: InDish! And random pastry shops.
T: InDish, of course! And the creamy truffle pasta with ox at Bistro André Citroën. Pastries were good, too-- Andersen's Bakery.

Place to Go
M: I go to Strøget a lot, just to get out of the house. But my favorite places are probably Nyhavn, Jaegersborg Dyrehave (which we just call Dyrehaven), and Amalienborg Palace (especially at night). And Frederiksberg Have is really nice.
T: I liked just walking around-- Nyhavn, Strøget, the castles... I really liked Amalienborg and the Spiral Church. And Dyrehaven.

Place to Shop
M: Søstrene Grene and Zara. And I think the girls at all four H&Ms know me by name.
T: SuperBest, since it's the only place I went!

Train Station
M: Østerport. It's quaint and not terribly busy. Up until the last month we were there, it still had old-timey tickers telling the time until the next train. I go to Nørreport most often (easy transport to the metro, walk to Strøget), but I'm not crazy about it.
T: Svanemøllen, since it's where we lived and the one I saw the most. I also liked Hellerup and the station by Dyrehaven (Klampenborg).

Word in Danish
M: Frederiksberg: friess-bearg (s like a snake and soft on the g)
T: Maybe "tak" (thank you) or "tog" (train). (M: And I'll add "Svanemøllen," Todd got really good at pronouncing it.)

Danish Food
M: Koldskål and kammerjunker! (cookies in fermented buttermilk soup)
T: I like flødeboller (chocolate-coated marshmallow) for dessert, and I really liked the Christmas dinner we had at the Stewarts' with the duck and potatoes.

Funniest Observation about Danes
M: They are so patient! Pedestrians wait for the walk signal, even if no one is coming. I've hardly heard any honking cars. If someone is slow at bagging their groceries, there are no comments (and almost never offers of help). And I'm pretty sure there's no "excuse me" phrase in Danish, because people never ask others to move. They just wait.
T: It's interesting how much drinking is a part of their culture. At company parties, even the executives get sloshed and it's acceptable.

Street
M: Nyhavn, Olufsvej (rainbow houses), and Kildevaeldsgade (the street between us and the train station). But so many streets are charming!
T: Nyhavn.

Østerbro

I've written some about our adventures and our travels, but here's a little bit about our neighborhood.

We live in the Northeast part of the city, Østerbro, at 8A Helsingborggade (our building is the first white one on the right). 

It's the quite, family-oriented, "boring" part of the city. We knew picked it on purpose-- no bars downstairs, thank you! Just lots and lots of bikes.

Before we really figured out where we lived, we knew to get home by turning left at Hello Kitty.

The bus that takes us to church, the 4A line, is half a block from our door. and we can get anywhere in the city from our train station, Svanemøllen. (For me, "anywhere" is usually down to Norreport Station for a walk/shop on Strøget, to H&M, Tiger, or Søstrene Grene.) 

The walk to the station is through a beautiful little neighborhood, which we think is somewhat exclusive. (Todd often sees an older woman with a trio of bodyguards leaving her home on his way to work.) We walk past this cobblestone plaza every day.

The charm of daily train travel in Europe hasn't worn off one for me little bit-- Todd has even grown to like it!

We have at least six grocery stores within 10 minutes' walk of our apartment. We shop mostly at SuperBest and Kiwi. Most stores have generally similar things as the US, albeit fewer packaged foods and less variety, but better quality produce. People pack their own bags and pull little rolling baskets around the store instead of pushing carts.

There are two parks near us-- we've gone on a few walks through Fælledparken (where the Football Stadium is, we can hear cheering from our apartment) and jogged a few times around the pond in Kildevældsparken. But probably our favorite neighborhood stop is InDish-- the best restaurant we've found in Copenhagen, just around the corner. (And the best price, ~$60 for butter chicken, chicken jalfrazi, and two mayo lassis.)  We eat there... a lot. :)

Godt Nytår 2014

We returned from Barcelona on New Year's Eve. We had been gone for a week so we had no food in our house, and our flight arrived after all of the stores and restaurants were closed for the holiday... for two days. We wandered around the neighborhood for more than half an hour trying to find an open store, and the only thing open was a bagel shop. Basically all we had to eat that day was a reheated-from-frozen bagel apiece (for like $25). We managed to laugh about it even though were were starving.

We'd been told New Year's Eve in Copenhagen was like the Fourth of July in America, just drunker and more dangerous. We decided to avoid the chaos downtown and see what we could from our rooftop apartment. It was incredible! The sky was full of fireworks everywhere we looked, beginning in the afternoon when the sun went down and picking up as the night went on. The hour around the turn of midnight was like a 365-degree constant finale show. These were technically amateur neighborhood fireworks, but none of them would be legal in the US! The morning afterward, the streets were void of people but covered in smoldering debris and ash. Østerbro looked like a war zone.

Todd stayed up for the entire, hours-long show. I kept thinking it was nearly over and getting in bed, but the booms and lights were so constant I gave up sleeping and went back out to enjoy the show. I rolled out of bed and took all the covers and with me, which Todd found hilarious.

We took so many pictures and videos trying to capture this awesome scene, none of which even come close to showing how cool it was. I doubt we'll ever see anything like that again!

Barcelona

We escaped dreary Copenhagen for sunny Spain two days after Christmas. The minute we got out of the airport, we took off our coats and basked in 50 degrees and sunshine waiting for the train. We missed the sun so much!

We chose Barcelona for two reasons: sunshine and the Sagrada Familia. Our hotel was a few blocks away from the church and couldn't possibly have had a better view!

The inside doesn't look like the outside at all-- white and bright, with beautiful stained glass that casts rainbows all over the place. 

Hands down, the most beautiful cathedral interior we've seen anywhere.

Most of our time was spent just sort of wandering around the city. The architecture is beautiful-- it's like Rome and Paris combined, with the addition of some crazy Gaudi designs. We spent a lot of time just walking around... usually purposefully because it was pretty and warm-ish, though one day we basically hiked up Montjuïc because Google Maps picked the wrong Metro stop.

Todd was a bearded mountain man on this trip. He doesn't think it looked too bad, but I thought he looked kinda homeless. See that reddish stubble?

We've never eaten such authentic food!  Todd tried (and loved) it all-- cured mountain lion, bombas (fried balls of dough/fish), bacalo (salt cod?), whole squid, and seafood paella. My cousin, Lacey, told us about a place in Barceloneta that defined hole-in-the-wall. There wasn't even a sign on the door or a printed menu. SUPER authentic and delicious! I probably would have enjoyed that part of the trip a lot more if I hadn't been pregnant and generally uninterested in eating. (Though we did find me an excellent burrito place. Overjoyed.) 

Our favorite activity was probably going out to Spain's first National Park, Montserrat. The view was just incredible.

There's a cathedral and monastery at the top. How they got the materials for such an ornate building up that mountain, I do not know.

We stopped there for a bit, but then took the steepest aerial tram I've ever seen and hiked up to the 16th-century hermitage carved into the mountain side.

The last day of our trip, we went to the Picasso museum and down to the beach and just sat there in the warm sun (in coats, it wasn't that warm). Have I mentioned how grateful we are to have taken so many awesome trips in the past 5 months? Loved Barcelona. So blessed.

Jul in Copenhagen

I expected Christmastime in Europe to be just about the most snowy, charming, adorable, perfect thing imaginable. Aside from the snow, our pre-Christmas experience in Germany was just that. 

In Copenhagen, Strøget had lights and garlands, the department stores had festive window displays, and Tivoli looked gorgeous decked out in a Russian Christmas theme. 

There were definitely wonderful things. But overall, Christmastime in Copenhagen was just kind of... fine. We were just lonely and bored.

 Mom and Dad visited right before Christmas, which was just perfect timing.

I kept our big news to myself until Todd joined us a few hours after they arrived. I told them we had a present for them and had Mom open a little bag with a baby outfit and a pregnancy test in it. Both she and Dad were surprised and happy and congratulatory, but Mom was like... beyond. Never will I give her a better gift.

We took a canal tour, walked Strøget and Nyhavn, saw the lights at Tivoli, caught a Christmas recital at Copenhagen Cathedral and took day trips out to the Louisiana Museum and Frederiksborg Castle. It was lovely!

Danes celebrate on Christmas Eve with a traditional dinner, gift exchange, and singing around the tree. We were invited to spend the evening with the Stewart family in our ward. They made all the traditional foods (pork with skin, sugared potatoes, fermented cabbage, rice pudding), taught us some Danish songs to sing while dancing around the tree, and even got us a bunch of gifts! They were just beyond kind and it was fun to experience an authentic Danish Christmas.

Christmas Day was pretty uneventful. We had opened our presents to each other the day before, in keeping with Danish tradition (Todd got me a bracelet and prints of Corot paintings, I got him a few movies and an IOU for a BBQ smoker), so there was really not a lot to do on Christmas Day. We watched movies, played games, and read.

In the evening, when our families in America were finally awake, we chatted with them online. We watched Cait and Shelbey open presents, then surprised them with the news of Baby W. I held a little baby outfit up to the computer screen and told them we had another gift coming in August. They freaked out, it was funny! Todd's family was equally surprised and happy-- we told them in the same way as my sisters, but I put a little #11 tag on the baby outfit since ours will be Jim and Cheri's 11th grandbaby. Surprise, everybody!

The Biggest News

Sjælør Station, 8 December 2013

On December 8, this guy found out he was going to be a dad.

We decided we'd start letting nature decide our family planning in October. I was a little neurotic the first month--following every dietary guideline, taking my nasty pre-natals religiously, spraying myself down with magnesium oil, checking my “what to expect” apps multiple times per day, penciling in my maternity leave, and planning how to tell our families. And then we didn’t get pregnant.

I'm crazy, but I'm also practical and lazy, and it seemed pointless and exhausting to repeat this every month until we did get pregnant. So the next month I was completely lax. I don't think I did one single thing to prepare or plan.

December 8 was day 31.5 of my very predictable 29-30 day cycle. I was certain the usual things were beginning... but nothing happened, so I decided to take a test after church. I wasn't neurotic or anxious about it because I felt exactly the same as always and had all month. I almost felt dumb even testing, but I was late. I set the test down in the bathroom and left to go make dinner without even setting a timer, figuring I'd come back to it whenever. But then I thought maybe I shouldn't leave it sitting out in the open and give Todd false hope, so I went back about a minute later to hide it. The result was already clear.

And how did the biggest news of my life feel? Not exactly surreal, but definitely a little strange, and happily ironic. Heavenly Father has a good sense of humor and a very kind way of teaching me to not be such a nutcase.

We had an appointment with the missionaries after dinner, so I waited about 4 hours to tell Todd. I intended to tell him when we got home. Nothing fancy, just snuggling on the sofa or something. But we had to wait 10 minutes for our train at Sjælør Station in South Copenhagen, just the two of us talking, and I just failed at small talk. I said something mundane like "I'm tired," and Todd said "Oh yeah? Why is that?"... and it just came out. "Guess who's pregnant?" (Todd said I then smiled deviously, clearly pleased with the power to break this news and my ability to hold it in for a whole 4 hours.)

He wasn't overly surprised, he being far more suspicious about my lateness than I was, and he loved the irony that I was pregnant when I was sure I wasn't. I almost immediately regretted telling him in such a dumb way at some random train station in South Copenhagen. But he said it was so me to spill the beans at some weird time/place, he was glad it happened that way. Sigh.

Baby Waddell is coming in August 2014!

The Day We Met GOB

The last day of our trip in Berlin, we took a Cold War tour. I was bored and freezing (even though I was literally wearing every sweater I packed and three pairs of socks). The tour ended at the Stasi Museum, the old headquarters of the East German spy operation. It looked interesting and I wanted to thaw, so we went in.

The headquarters mostly appear exactly as they did when they were in use-- cool, but also a little unremarkable because it's just a 70s office building. Exhibits are set up in each office to tell about the people who worked there. It was marginally interesting... until it suddenly became extremely interesting.

Leaning against the wall next to the entrance to an exhibit was GOB BLUTH.

Let me explain something. We've seen Arrested Development more than any other show ever. We quote the show (usually GOB) to each other on a daily basis. So this wasn't really about Will Arnett, Famous Person, but about GOB BLUTH, our most-quoted/favorite character of all time. There is probably no celebrity on earth we would be mutually more excited to see.

We both recognized him immediately (no question whatsoever) and stood in the next exhibit silently freaking out. Todd wanted to go back and say hello. It must be annoying to have people recognize you all the time, so I was inclined to just let him enjoy the museum undisturbed. And that's what we did. We left him alone... while we followed him around, taking covert pictures.

In our defense, the museum is really linear and we really had no choice but to follow him. So we silently walked around the whole museum with GOB BLUTH, inwardly freaking out and paying very little attention to the exhibits.

When we left, he and two friends were waiting for a cab at the entrance. I was still debating whether we should bug him. We exited the museum and walked around the carport, and I was still debating out loud. Todd was finally like, WE'RE DOING THIS, and walked right back with me in tow.

Todd was admirably cool. He said something like "Hey man, we debated it but we just had to: I'm a huge fan, my wife's a huge fan. Love your work. Would you mind if we got a picture?" GOB Will said "thank you, of course!" and shook Todd's hand, jumped in for a photo, and asked where we were from. He probably would have chatted with us for a bit, but Todd wanted to get us in and OUT because I was mumbling incomprehensibly and looked so embarrassed I wished the earth would swallow me up.

All the points to Todd. All the points.